It starts with tomorrow... We're going to Portland to watch Kalani's team play the championship game against Napa at L.E.S.T. Last year, they played the same team in the finals, but lost. Hopefully this year, it'll be different!
I've also started looking for our package to Vegas. Kalani has a tournament there in June, so he and I thought that we'd go, just Charlie and I, to watch. Charlie's never been to Vegas, so this is a great chance for us to go and have fun. We're going alone {:)}, our first trip without the kids since 2000! We went to Mexico that year for 8 days and had an absolute blast!!! 9 months later, Kiale was born :) The same thing will not happen this time, guaranteed!!! We always joke about how Kiale's got "Made in Mexico" stamped on his butt... I'm excited to see my friend Tara Joy who lives in Vegas when we go. Last time I saw her was 5 years ago at my grandma's birthday party! We've been able to keep in touch through myspace and facebook, though.
Two days after we get back from Vegas, we'll be headed to Hillsboro, Oregon for another tournament. We'll be taking the whole family for that one, so it should be fun.
In August, we're planning on driving all the way to DISNEYLAND! I've never been to Disney in California or Florida, but I have been to Disney Tokyo, which isn't something that too many people can say. Kalani and Maia have both been, but this will be Kiale's first time. He's so excited. Hopefully this trip pans out, as long as theres no financial bumps in the road! Life throws so many curve balls, it's crazy!!! I'm hoping to make it all the way down to San Diego to see my cousin Jaime who I haven't seen for YEARS now!!! He and I are the same age and grew up together. It'll be nice to sit and talk stories with him after so long.
Over and over again... "What's going on with Kaila?" We've been through so much with that kid. Her dad has been burned one too many times. She's just never gonna get it. We've always tried to teach our kids the importance and value of family. Kaila had just that. We gave her forgiveness. We gave her support in every aspect of her life. We gave her freedom. We gave her trust. We gave her responsibility with reward. We gave her love. We gave her communication. We gave her a shoulder to cry on. We gave her reliability. All we asked for in return was honesty and respect.
First, we lost the honesty. She had met a boy. She told us about him... He was 19 and still in high school. She was 15, at the time. She got the expected no, of course. After that, we busted her still communicating with him in an inappropriate manner. Charlie went and talked to the boy, but apparently he didn't get the picture.
With losing the honesty, we lost the respect since lying was being disrespectful. More poor choices on her part caused us to make the hardest decision, that we were done with her. Some people may wonder how a parent can come to that decision, but after all that we've been through with her, it was the right one. I'm not saying that it was an easy one, it was just the opposite. But the things that this kid did were just unbelievable. She put a price tag on her relationship with her dad when she tried to sue him for about $8000, what she though the value of all her material crap that she left here was. (And the value wasn't even close to that much). She even tried to sue him for the stuff that WE bought her.
All though it was difficult at first, we just laugh about it now.
But lets look at where her life has led her:
-She's still with that guy, who is now 20. He has no drivers liscense, no job, no college, no future. The best line that I heard came from one of my good friends, she said "If you're gonna dog your family, make sure that he's good looking and got lots of money or something!" So true. It's pretty sad when HIS family is telling me that he's a loser.
-Her grades have plummeted. When Kaila was here she had A's and B's. She's spent the entire school year pulling herself out of a hole, trying to bring up F's and D's.
-She made a softball team, but they're nothing compared to the team that Kalani is on. Me and Kalani joke about how Kalani's 14u team could beat their 18u team. And from what we hear, she's got no one to pay for her softball fees.
-We had her one foot in the door at UH. We had set a path for her to be a Warrior and to even play softball for them at some point in her college career. Now, she better get those Community College Applications out.
Through all of this, it's been harder for us to NOT do anything. It was so hard for me to NOT tell her that it would all be ok, and that we would work it out. I didn't give birth to her, but she's still my daughter, but I'll support Charlie's decisions regardless. He's doing fine with everything now, but the scars will always be there. We both don't see anything that she could possibly do to fix what she's done.
Do I have anything to say to Kaila? I'm not sure. I think that her not being apart of our family anymore affects her more than anything that I could ever say. She's missed out on so much. A second trip to Hawai'i to visit the family... Having 20+ people at her games cheering her on... Every single aspect of her brothers life, his first football season, his wrestling victories... Those are things that you can never get back.
If I had to say anything to her, it'd probably be this... my favorite saying...
"Keep your eye on the destination... Remember your upbringing and the values we have instilled in you... Ho'omaika'i ~ go and be a light to the world"
We so tried to implant this motto into her head. I can name a thousand examples that would represent this saying, but obviously, none of it got embedded into that brain of hers.